Archive for January 2008

Discover the 90/10 Secret

January 29, 2008

It Will Change Your Life!
The 90/10 secret is incredible! Very few know and apply this secret. The result? Millions of people are suffering undeserved stress, trials, problems, and heartache. They never seem to be a success in life.

The 90/10 secret is incredible! Very few know and apply this secret. The result? Millions of people are suffering undeserved stress, trials, problems, and heartache. They never seem to be a success in life.

Bad days follow bad days. Terrible things seem to be constantly happening. Their is constant stress, lack of joy, and broken relationships. Worry consumes time, anger breaks friendships, and life seems dreary and is not enjoyed to the fullest.. Friends are lost. Life is a bore and often seems cruel.

Does this describe you? If so, do not be discouraged. You can be different! Understand and apply the 90/10 secret. It will change your life! What is this secret?

10 of life is made up of what happens to you.

90 of life is decided by how you react.

What does this mean? We really have no control over 10 of what happens to us. We cannot stop the car from breaking down. The plane may be late arriving, which throws our whole schedule off. A driver may cut us off in traffic. We have no control over this 10 .

The other 90 is different. You determine the other 90 ! How? By your reaction. You cannot control a red light, but you can control your reaction. Don’t let people fool you, YOU can control how you react!

Let’s use an example.

You’re eating breakfast with your family. Your daughter knocks over a cup of coffee onto your business shirt. You have no control over what just happened. What happens next will be determined by how you react.

You curse. You harshly scold your daughter for knocking the coffee cup over. She breaks down in tears. After scolding her, you turn to your spouse and criticize them for placing the cup to close to the edge of the table. A short verbal battle follows. You storm upstairs and change your shirt.

Back downstairs you find your daughter has been to busy crying to finish breakfast and get ready for school. She misses the bus. Your spouse must leave immediately for work. You rush to the car and drive your daughter to school.

Because you are late, you drive 40 miles an hour in a 30 mph speed limit.. After a 15 minute delay and throwing 60 away, you arrive at school. Your daughter runs to the building without saying good-bye. After arriving at the office 20 minutes late, you find you forgot your briefcase.

Your day has started terrible. As it continues, it seems to get worse and worse. You look forward to going home. When you arrive home you find small wedge in your relationship with your spouse and daughter. Why? Because of how you reacted in the morning.

Why did you have a bad day?

A) Did the coffee cause it?
B) Did your daughter cause it?
C) Did the Policeman cause it?
D) Did you cause it?

The answer is d. You had no control over what happened with the coffee. How you reacted in those 5 seconds is what caused your bad day. Here is what could have and should have happened.

Coffee splashes over you. Your daughter is about to cry. You gently say “It’s OK honey, you just need to be more careful next time”. Grabbing a towel you rush upstairs. After grabbing a new shirt and your briefcase. You come back down in time look through the window and see your child getting on the bus. She turns and waves.

You and your spouse kiss before you both go to work. You arrive 5 minutes early and cheerfully greet the staff. Your boss comments on how good of day you are having.

Notice the difference. Two different scenarios. Both started the same. Both ended different. Why? Because of how you REACTED. You really do not have any control over 10 of what happens. The other 90 is determined by your reaction. Here are some ways to apply the 90/10 secret.

If someone says something negative about you, do not be sponge. Let the attack roll off like water on glass. You do have to let the negative comment affect you! React properly and it will not ruin your day. A wrong reaction could result in losing a friend, being fired, getting stressed out, etc.

How do you react if someone cuts you off in traffic? Do you loose your temper? Pound the steering wheel? (A friend of mine had the steering wheel fall off!) Do you curse? Does your blood pressure skyrocket? Do you try and bump them? WHO CARES if you arrive ten seconds later at work? Why let the blue car ruin your drive. Remember the 90-10 principle, and do not worry about it!

You are told you lost your job. Why lose sleep or get irritated? It will work out. Use your “worrying” energy and time into finding another job.

The plane is late. It is going to mangle your schedule for the day. Why take out your frustration on the flight attendant? She has no control over what is going on. Use your time to study, get to know the other passenger, etc. Why get stressed out? It will just make things worse.

p.s: An Inspirational Thought, Motivational Thought – 90/10 Secret

Why People Leave

January 27, 2008

For the individuals considering a change in job, the reasons can be as many and varied as the personalities involved. For the organization with pathologically high turnover,a few reasons account for most departures:

  • a just-passing-through mentality: Co-workers engender no feelings of long-term involvement in the job.
  • a feeling of disposability: Management can only think of its workers as interchangeable parts (since turnover is so high, nobody is indispensable).
  • a sense that loyalty would be ludicrous: Who could be loyal to an organization that views its people as parts?

Source: Productive Projects and Teams 2nd ed, written by Tom DeMarco & Timothy Lister

An Iranian Succeed Girl

January 22, 2008

I’m so glad to heard about an Iranian succeed girl.  Dr Gelareh Zadeh is the youngest female brain surgeon in Britain. she born in Shiraz. you can find more about her by reading the continue of this post:

Have brain surgery and be home for tea

Dr Gelareh Zadeh

Patients with brain tumours are to be offered fast-track day surgery for the first time.

The procedure, during which the patient remains awake, is being pioneered by Britain’s youngest female brain surgeon working with a team based at University College Hospital. Dr Gelareh Zadeh, 35, is a specialist in malignant brain tumours and one of the few female brain surgeons in the world.

Her first patient was 52-year-old businesswoman Deborah Calder, who had the operation in July and has since made a full recovery. Dr Zadeh told the Evening Standard today that there has already been interest from other London hospitals in the work of the Brain Metastatic Clinic and the technique is to be adopted by the NHS.

Until now, patients have had to stay in hospital for up to a week after brain tumour surgery to allow them to recover fully from the after-effects of a general anaesthetic. But with day surgery, doctors can use a local anaesthetic which they inject into the patient’s scalp to “freeze” it before making an incision in their skull.

Dr Zadeh said: “The fact the patient can be awake makes them feel a lot better after surgery and it makes it a lot easier for doctors to operate.

“It is also good for cancer patients who cannot tolerate a general anaesthetic. Before, people would have to stay in for at least two days and sometimes up to a week. Deborah chatted to us all during the operation and after observingher and doing a scan we were happy to let her home to her family.”

Mrs Calder, who had cancer in her lungs before it spread to her brain, married her partner of 20 years, 72-year-old Johnny, a few days after having the operation. She said: “When I first found out my cancer had spread to the brain I was really shocked and upset, especially as they couldn’t say what my chances were.

“But they got me into surgery really quickly and Gelareh was almost like a friend to me. She is so caring, a really exceptional and special person. I trusted her totally and the whole team made me feel very safe.”

“It was a bit strange at first when they started putting pins into my head but I knew that if anything went wrong then they would give me a general anaesthetic. By the evening I was at home with my family having a cup of tea. There is no doubt this saved my life. It has given me a whole new lease of life.”

More than half of all adult brain tumours are caused by cancer in other parts of the body spreading.

The aim of the Brain Metastatic Clinic is to identify patients with secondary brain tumours so their treatment can be managed effectively. Day brain surgery is already a standard procedure in other countries.

People in our lives

January 21, 2008

Many times of these days I think about this subject: Why God puts some people in our lives? Sometimes their life spans (in our life) are short, but they have the long-lived and great effect in our life. Of course I talk about the negative/bad impacts.

We know the God loves human beings. He said in Qur’an*: the human beings are the Excellency of creatures. So, why he puts some people in our lives, they deposit many negative impacts in our lives and made us annoyed for a long time?! Is it a paradox in God’s kindness?!

I think NO. Let me talk about some of God’s interests.One of the major interests of God is: the people always connecting him, and talk him about their requests and wishes.  He doesn’t like one of his created beings forget him and relies on others.

Let us to honest with ourselves. When you remember the God and asked him your desires? If you judging fairly, the answers are like: when I’m sad or when I was in bad situation or when I missed a valuable thing or person (maybe he/she has been died or to left you alone…)

I believe that when we forget the God, the bad event occurs, because he doesn’t like the creatures forget him and he wants to remember this fact to us, because he loves us. I think this is the first goal of God to putting us in bad conditions. Also I think the bad events are examinations of our patience. How much we have tolerances in bad situations and how we encountering them? Are we ungratefulness or ingratitude toward God?

And the second aim? I think the second goal of God is: improvement and expanding our experiments about our personality and relationships. Am I right? I think acquainted with everybody – and in general, every relation – will be welfare our knowledge base about mankind and their spiritual matters.

You know when somebody injury you (either material or spiritual), s/he also teach you a lesson. If you are clever, the next times you act prudently and don’t allow anybody to harm you in the same way.

I think life is full of these types of lessons and experiences. And you should apply them in similar circumstances to be succeed. When we are sad, we can’t decide logically and we can’t distinguish which is better for us. For example in these bad situations you can ask yourself: the bad situation in this time is better or bad consequences of this transient happiness that made a terrible life for me in future? And then you can make a trade off between the answers.

Remember, with all of awful events, your life is flowing till now…Are you remembering sometimes in past you decided to killing yourself because of critical pressures? But you are still alive and can breathe the life…Therefore, I think, we should thanks God for all of our belongings and non belongings. 

* Qur’an: Qur’an is the Moslems holy book (like gospel of matter for Christians)   

Two Kinds of Judgement

January 15, 2008

I hate to be exposed to a judgement! specially when I know that the criterions aren’t fairly and I have to accept the results!  I read the article bellow but I’m not satisfied yet! because the author forgot to write that is important that selector must be fair! s/he must consider all circumstances and also must be impartial.

There are two different ways people judge you. Sometimes judging you correctly is the end goal. But there’s a second much more common type of judgement where it isn’t. We tend to regard all judgements of us as the first type. We’d probably be happier if we realized which are and which aren’t.The first type of judgement, the type where judging you is the end goal, include court cases, grades in classes, and most competitions. Such judgements can of course be mistaken, but because the goal is to judge you correctly, there’s usually some kind of appeals process. If you feel you’ve been misjudged, you can protest that you’ve been treated unfairly.Nearly all the judgements made on children are of this type, so we get into the habit early in life of thinking that all judgements are.

But in fact there is a second much larger class of judgements where judging you is only a means to something else. These include college admissions, hiring and investment decisions, and of course the judgements made in dating. This kind of judgement is not really about you.

Put yourself in the position of someone selecting players for a national team. Suppose for the sake of simplicity that this is a game with no positions, and that you have to select 20 players. There will be a few stars who clearly should make the team, and many players who clearly shouldn’t. The only place your judgement makes a difference is in the borderline cases. Suppose you screw up and underestimate the 20th best player, causing him not to make the team, and his place to be taken by the 21st best. You’ve still picked a good team. If the players have the usual distribution of ability, the 21st best player will be only slightly worse than the 20th best. Probably the difference between them will be less than the measurement error.

The 20th best player may feel he has been misjudged. But your goal here wasn’t to provide a service estimating people’s ability. It was to pick a team, and if the difference between the 20th and 21st best players is less than the measurement error, you’ve still done that optimally.

It’s a false analogy even to use the word unfair to describe this kind of misjudgement. It’s not aimed at producing a correct estimate of any given individual, but at selecting a reasonably optimal set.

One thing that leads us astray here is that the selector seems to be in a position of power. That makes him seem like a judge. If you regard someone judging you as a customer instead of a judge, the expectation of fairness goes away. The author of a good novel wouldn’t complain that readers were unfair for preferring a potboiler with a racy cover. Stupid, perhaps, but not unfair.

Our early training and our self-centeredness combine to make us believe that every judgement of us is about us. In fact most aren’t. This is a rare case where being less self-centered will make people more confident. Once you realize how little most people judging you care about judging you accurately—once you realize that because of the normal distribution of most applicant pools, it matters least to judge accurately in precisely the cases where judgement has the most effect—you won’t take rejection so personally.

And curiously enough, taking rejection less personally may help you to get rejected less often. If you think someone judging you will work hard to judge you correctly, you can afford to be passive. But the more you realize that most judgements are greatly influenced by random, extraneous factors—that most people judging you are more like a fickle novel buyer than a wise and perceptive magistrate—the more you realize you can do things to influence the outcome.

One good place to apply this principle is in college applications. Most high school students applying to college do it with the usual child’s mix of inferiority and self-centeredness: inferiority in that they assume that admissions committees must be all-seeing; self-centeredness in that they assume admissions committees care enough about them to dig down into their application and figure out whether they’re good or not. These combine to make applicants passive in applying and hurt when they’re rejected. If college applicants realized how quick and impersonal most selection processes are, they’d make more effort to sell themselves, and take the outcome less personally.

p.s:  Kinds of Judgement

The Mind Walls

January 14, 2008

One day a scientist did an attractive examination. he made a glassy aquarium and divided it into 2 parts with a glassy wall. He put a big fish in the first part and a small fish in second part which the small fish was the favorite food of big fish.

The small fish was the only food of big fish and the scientist didn’t feed any foods to big fish. The big fish, attacked to small fish many times! but he clashed to invisible wall repeatedly. the glassy wall, separated him for his favorite food!

Finally, the big fish changed his mind for attacks to the small fish. he believed going to another part of aquarium and eating the small fish is impossible! 

And then, the scientist removed the glassy wall and opened the big fish’s was! But the big fish, didn’t attack to the small fish anyway. he never put his steps to another part of aquarium later.do you know why?!Although, the glassy wall didn’t exist next times, but the big fish made a glassy wall in his mind. A Mind Wall which breaking it is more difficult from breaking any real walls.  The big fish, believed his mind wall.  A belief to constraint, a belief to existence of a wall, a belief  to his weakness!If we research in our beliefs nicely, we could find many glassy walls, which many of them aren’t the results of our experiments and observations. Also many of these glassy walls aren’t in real world and they are just in our minds!

Related links: after the post I searched Google and found these nice articles:
1- Mind Walls
2- The Sun of Self on the Wall of Mind
3- Walls in the Mind-They Cripple and They Bind-Keep Us All Confined

Employed Women’s Worries

January 13, 2008

One of the employed women’s (I mean the women’s who have a specified business) worries is to establish equilibrium between their job and their families. Although I am single, but I heard so many stories from my married friends that they have difficulty in this problem.

My motivate for writing this post was a story from GoogleBlog. I loved the story and try to share it with you. I will write more about this subject later.

Baby steps to a new job:

In late 2004, Google opened an engineering office near Seattle, and my son Elliott was born. I had heard great things from my friends who worked for the company down in California, and I was eager to join their ranks in this new local office. But the timing was all wrong: I wanted to spend a few years at home with my new baby.

Elliott and I had lots of fun. We went to the park and the library together. We read nursery rhymes and played peek-a-boo. We baked muffins and did finger painting. We did not, however, debate the relative merits of our favorite cache replacement policies, or write and debug multithreaded C++ code. So by the time Elliott was ready to start preschool and I was ready to go back to work, I had to ask: Would I still be able to pass a Google interview, or had I forgotten all of my technical skills?

If I wanted to land the job, I had to get serious: I needed to brush up on my data structures and algorithms, my coding, not to mention general interview skills. For the next few months, I hired a babysitter to come and watch Elliott one afternoon a week. I split that time between studying my college computer science textbooks and participating in online coding contests. The coding contests were particularly valuable because they forced me to work through the design and coding stages quickly, just like in an interview. The details of the standard Java and C++ libraries came back to me as I scrambled to get my contest code to run before time was up. I even asked friends to do mock interviews with me so I could get used to writing code on a whiteboard again.

In the end, all of this paid off. My day of interviews went really well, and I got the job!

The Seattle-area office and Elliott turned three recently; they’re both thriving. I feel very fortunate to have the two of them in my life. And I’d encourage anyone — including new moms — who is interested in a job at Google to go for it.

Did You Know Iran?

January 12, 2008

As an Iranian girl, one of things make me sad is that the people of other nations haven’t good viewpoint about my country Iran. When I chat with them, many people ridicule Iranian because they didn’t become familiar with Iran and our great and peaceful culture and history because of political issues!

Iran is a great country with a deeply culture. We have many scientists, inventers, historians and famous poets like Kharazmi, Abo Ali Sina (Ebn Sina), Moulavi, Hafiz, Saadi, Roodaki, Zakaria Raazi, Attar Neishabouri, Khayyam, Ferdowsi, Jaber ebn Hayyan, Dr Hesabi, Parvin Etesami, and Forough Farrokhzad (these 2 last mentioned are females), and so on (list of iranian scientists and scholars). They were celebrated man of their age. Also many of them have international celebrity till now! The area of Iran is above 1 million kilometers. Iran’s population is about 70 millions. Iran has Caspian Sea in the north and Uremia Lake inside it (in the Azerbaijan province). The Persian Gulf and Hormoz Sea are located in south of Iran. Also Iran has so many resources of natural gas (second rank in world after Russia) and oil and other mineral reserves. The most famous neighbors of Iran are:  Russia, Turkey, Iraq, Afghanistan, Pakistan, and Saudi Arabia.

You can find more about iran in wikipedia.

In our childish books (in elementary and secondary school) we learned that we must respect to other countries and peoples and their cultures. Seemingly this is not in vogue in other countries especially in modern and developed countries! They always despise people in developing or under developing countries. They usually think these countries are petrified and backward nations!

I’m interested in to know what you learn about other countries in your geographical and historical books, especially about Iran? Please let me know… 

I hate racism. I think everybody should love his/her country and also respect to other nations and shouldn’t belittling their nationalities and mores.  

Related note: I found this nice poem, This poem was nominated poem of 2005. Written by an African kid, amazing thought :

“When I born, I Black, When I grow up, I Black,
When I go in Sun, I Black, When I scared, I Black,
When I sick, I Black, And when I die, I still black…
And you White fellow,
When you born, you pink, When you grow up, you White,
When you go in Sun, you Red, When you cold, you blue,
When you scared, you yellow, When you sick, you Green,
And when you die, you Gray…
And you call me colored???..

Music World-Enigma

January 9, 2008

I love many bands or singers in music world. But my first and unique love is Enigma. Many spaces of my mobile’s phone device’s RAM are occupied by Enigma’s Melodies. May be I tired or to catch headache (!) to listening other music or songs but I couldn’t remember any time that I cut an Enigma’s songs. I thing Enigma’s music have so many mysteries (like its name). I listened too many times these albums:
Voyageur (2003)
Lord of Dance (2001)
The Screen behind the Mirror (2000)
Demotion Project (1999)
Le Roi Est Mort, Vive Le Roi! (1997)
Return to Innocence (1995)
Cross of Changes (1994)
Mcmxd A.D (1990)

And some of songs that I loved are:
Sadness, mea culpa, beyond the invisible, return to innocence, close to heaven, November, angels weep, why, shadows in silence, smell of desire, rivers of belief, evolution, almost full moon, T.N.T for the brain, look of today, sunless sea., Total Eclipse Of The Moon, From East To West, Voyageur

Here is the lyrics of Why! Songs that I loved it:
I was childish and unfair
To you, my only friend
I regret, but now it’s too late   
I can’t show you any more
The things I’ve learned from you
Cause life just took you away   
I’m asking why
I’m asking why
Nobody gives an answer
I’m just asking why   
But someday we’ll meet again
And I’ll ask you   
I’ll ask you why
Why it has to be like this
I’m asking you why
Please give me an answer   
Many years and stupid fights
Till we accept to see
How it was and it’ll always be   
Why it has to be like this
Why we don’t realize
Why we’re too blind to see the one
Who’s always on our side?   
I’m asking why
I’m asking why
Nobody gives an answer
I’m just asking why   
Just tell me why, Why it has to be like this
That the good ones disappear
I’m asking you why   
I’m asking why
I’m asking why
Nobody gives an answer
I’m just asking why   
I’m asking why

The First Snow in Tehran

January 9, 2008

The first snow coming down 🙂 and Tehran is white now. I was in holidays till today. Many of schools and universities have been closed in Iran.

I heard some news said: tomorrow (Thursday) the weather will be colder. Also meteorology organization said: these precipitations are peerless in last 50 years ago!
p.s: here is some pictures of Tehran’s snow in shahrzad weblog.

Christians Anger & Forgiveness

January 5, 2008

Anger is a normal sentiment we feel when something unjust has happened to us, or when someone has let us down or hurt us (whether deliberately or not). We can see many places in the Bible where God becomes angry. This anger usually comes as a reaction to injustice and sin. The problem with anger is not anger itself, but anger that remains unresolved, and that leads to bitterness and unforgiveness.

If we are very hurt and very angry, our anger can overcome us. Bitterness can take on a power all of its own. Bitterness towards the person who has hurt us or let us down leads to hate. This is quite the opposite of love – love being the experience that as Christians we should always aspire to know within us. We need to know God’s love for us. We also need to have a love for other people, and we can give this out of the inspirational love that God provides in our lives.

read more about the danger of anger

If we have any natural fault, it is hiding our own anger from ourselves.  Here is a checklist to help you determine if you are hiding your anger from yourself.  Any of these is usually a sign of hidden unexpressed anger.

How to Develop the Habit of Writing Posts in Advance

January 1, 2008

Many times, when I try to write a post, I have no idea, and I couldn’t remember any of my previous ideas, but when I hearing music or walking and so on… many subjects come in my mind! I found a good post in Pro Blogger, which I think if we perform its instructions, will solve this problem!

Do you write and publish your posts in one sitting? Many bloggers do. Unfortunately, this kind of posting habit presents a number of problems. For example:

  • You won’t be able to develop a consistent posting rhythm. Your publish times will vary depending on whether you’re inspired, whether you have writer’s block, or whether you have time to write.
  • It’s difficult to be relaxed as you write when you need to publish your post quickly.
  • You’ll find yourself forced to publish what is really still a rough draft when your post takes longer than expected and you need to go somewhere, meet someone, or do something.

Writing hand-to-mouth can also hurt your blog’s traffic. If your posts appear whenever you’re able to write them, your readers will never be sure when to check your blog for an update. They’ll find it difficult to develop the habit of checking, and those that haven’t subscribed might start to forget you.

In this post, I want to outline a few methods you can use to develop the habit of writing posts in advance. It’s a habit that will save you a lot of stress in the long-run.

Write this week’s posts in one sitting

Instead of writing posts just before you publish them, try setting aside one day to write your posts for the rest of the week. It could be a few hours where the rest of the family is busy and you’re not, or the time and day when you tend to feel most creative.

Once you’ve written one post, you’ll find yourself able to write more smoothly as you tackle the next one. Your writing muscles are already warmed up. As you tick off posts, you’ll grow more confident in your abilities to produce good content, making each post easier to finish than the last.

Writing without the pressure of immediately having to publish what you’ve just written will also help you to be more relaxed as you write.

Once you’ve finished your posts for the week, you don’t have to think about producing content for seven days (unless you want to write for other blogs). You can publish your posts at the same time/day each week, meaning your readers will soon start to develop their own habit of checking your site for updates on those days when you regularly publish a new post.

Read the rest of this entry »

One in three think Everest is in Europe

January 1, 2008

Today I read an article in guardian and I can’t believe what I read! The most sentences in article made me surprised!! Here are some optional paragraphs:

One in three think Everest is in Europe as survey reveals poor geographical knowledge:

 

The most visited local “landmark” for many British adults is their nearby DIY store, according to a survey published today, which suggests we are a nation of reluctant explorers, with little sense of adventure and a poor understanding of geography. A third of those who took part in the survey thought Mount Everest is in Europe, while only half were aware that the Nile is the world’s longest river.

The research warns that most people are failing to make the most of their local area and have little knowledge of important geographical facts.

The survey was carried out to mark National Geographic’s geography awareness week and also today’s so-called “GIS Day”, which aims to encourage young people to understand the extent to which geographic information – and increasingly the opportunity to use technology such as digital mapping – underpins our daily lives.

The UK is among more than 80 countries which will participate by holding local events such as workshops and school assemblies.

Asked how many countries there were in the world, only a third were correct in choosing 193. A third of people thought Mount Everest was either in the Alps or the UK – it is in Nepal – and only half of respondents knew that the Nile was the world’s longest river.

Asked which facility had been visited the most during the past month, the DIY superstore came top with 39%. The local museum was bottom with only 9%. Almost a third said they had never visited their local museum or church and a quarter had never been to their leisure centre.

Respondents were also asked about what they remembered most about geography lessons at school from a list of eight topics. Maps came top with 24%, rocks/erosion and “don’t know” were in joint second place with 16%, and farming in last with 5%.

The findings follow a separate survey carried out earlier this week by the British Council, which showed that UK children aged 11 to 16 have the lowest international awareness among their age group in 10 countries.